I am facing my dreadful subject – Math. I am so weak at it that I really find it super hard to survive passing it. Yeah – maybe I could pass – but only barely.
I got no passing grade for the quizzes this Midterm period in this subject, and in next week we will have our Midterm Exams – which is a lot harder.
That is one of the reasons why I feel so tired and weak last Christmas – I felt like surrendering and giving up. I am en emotional being – easy to be encouraged, but also easy to be discouraged.
But after God has put in me the heart of worshipping Him in a much truer sense – I have now this conviction: I will surrender to God, and not to subjects, especially in Math. I would consider myself a success if I will regain my former glorious relationship with Him, even though I fail in this subject for the mean time. But I would consider myself a failure if I pass this subject but my former closeness to God would not be restored.
These past months, I was distracted and lost focused on God. That is my priority now – get back to God, and passing the class subjects are just secondary ones.